have hope, she will be loved ♥  photo bab89f77-8057-456c-b31e-f21fa3baf57d_zps5c0a267a.jpg
I have no idea who I am and frankly, I don’t think it’s something to worry about. Afterall, I have all the time in the world to create and define who I am. As of right now, I’m struggling on getting where I need to be; and where that is exactly… I have absolutely no idea. But in the meantime, I’ll enjoy the little things, learn from my mistakes, create memories, make tough decisions, and simply take things one day at a time.
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We all live in a world where people are constantly judging one another. I can honestly say it took me awhile to fully understand and learn that I'm not here to please everyone. I may not be a hundred percent comfortable speaking my mind, but having them on here is a start.


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 Day 108/365: April 19, 2014
Freaky Friday: If you could be someone else for a day, who would you be, and why? If that seems too easy, try this one: who would you like to have spend a day as you and what do you hope they’d learn from the experience?
If I could be anyone for a day it would be Demi Lovato. I don’t know why but she’s the first person that came to mind. I think it’d be really cool being on tour and being in a different city every night. I find that an efficient way of travelling the world. 
She’s also gorgeous, talented and umm… gorgeous. One of a few people I idolize if I may add. Since that’s all I can think of for that question I’ll talk about the second question. 
If someone could be me for a day it would probably have to be Max. I feel like if he were to be me for a day he’d know how I’d actually feel about him since I absolutely suck at expressing my feelings. He could just feel how he makes me feel. He can hear all the things that come to mind when I hear his name or his voice. I feel like a freak, a creepy freak for writing this but since I’m not Bella and can’t make images from my thoughts and brain then I guess this option could work.
I chose a boy to be me for a day. If that were to actually happen I don’t think anything I just wrote would happen. I feel like he’d be too curious and try to do things guys can’t do because its not socially acceptable. I think it’d be the same way for girls too. If a girl woke up in a guys body the emotions would: shock then curiosity.
But since this is just a writing prompt I’d want him to see how i see things, in particular how I view him. I think it’d be the best and most creepiest way to express your feelings to someone. You wouldn’t have to say anything, you’d just show them. I don’t know, maybe its just me. I’m just a very visual person. Pictures and videos are always a plus for me. Hahaha. 
And here I am, all caught up with my 365 day challenge posts. This month has been really hectic and I’m surprised I’m still doing this. Hopefully I make the year. 

 Day 108/365: April 19, 2014

Freaky Friday: If you could be someone else for a day, who would you be, and why? If that seems too easy, try this one: who would you like to have spend a day as you and what do you hope they’d learn from the experience?

If I could be anyone for a day it would be Demi Lovato. I don’t know why but she’s the first person that came to mind. I think it’d be really cool being on tour and being in a different city every night. I find that an efficient way of travelling the world. 

She’s also gorgeous, talented and umm… gorgeous. One of a few people I idolize if I may add. Since that’s all I can think of for that question I’ll talk about the second question. 

If someone could be me for a day it would probably have to be Max. I feel like if he were to be me for a day he’d know how I’d actually feel about him since I absolutely suck at expressing my feelings. He could just feel how he makes me feel. He can hear all the things that come to mind when I hear his name or his voice. I feel like a freak, a creepy freak for writing this but since I’m not Bella and can’t make images from my thoughts and brain then I guess this option could work.

I chose a boy to be me for a day. If that were to actually happen I don’t think anything I just wrote would happen. I feel like he’d be too curious and try to do things guys can’t do because its not socially acceptable. I think it’d be the same way for girls too. If a girl woke up in a guys body the emotions would: shock then curiosity.

But since this is just a writing prompt I’d want him to see how i see things, in particular how I view him. I think it’d be the best and most creepiest way to express your feelings to someone. You wouldn’t have to say anything, you’d just show them. I don’t know, maybe its just me. I’m just a very visual person. Pictures and videos are always a plus for me. Hahaha. 

And here I am, all caught up with my 365 day challenge posts. This month has been really hectic and I’m surprised I’m still doing this. Hopefully I make the year. 

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April 19, 2014: First Aces Game 
Alaska Aces vs. Las Vegas Wranglers. The Wranglers may have gotten the first goal, but we won 3-1. It was one hell of a game. Boring at times, but fairly entertaining. The referees were shit. They weren’t calling any penalties and were pretty much pissing everyone in the arena off. There was even a fight in the crowd. Since the referees kept breaking up fights there was a fight in the crowd. A drunk ass woman throwing punches at a man. It was pretty insane but she handled herself well. 
If you ask me, best first Aces game ever. 

April 19, 2014: First Aces Game 

Alaska Aces vs. Las Vegas Wranglers. 
The Wranglers may have gotten the first goal, but we won 3-1. It was one hell of a game. Boring at times, but fairly entertaining. The referees were shit. They weren’t calling any penalties and were pretty much pissing everyone in the arena off. There was even a fight in the crowd. Since the referees kept breaking up fights there was a fight in the crowd. A drunk ass woman throwing punches at a man. It was pretty insane but she handled herself well. 

If you ask me, best first Aces game ever. 

1 day ago | 0 notes | reblog
Day 107/365: April 18, 2014
Unknown Caller: You receive a call from an unexpected person.Who is it, and what is the conversation about? Go!
This has actually happened to me recently. I received a call from a friend whom I haven’t seen or talked to in awhile. His name won’t be typed but I will talk about what happened. 
He called at around 10:00pm. He was drunk and was calling the people from his contact list and he told me he’d talk to the first person who would answer. I guess I was that person. We talked for about two hours.
What we talked about, I can’t remember. I’m still trying to comprehend how long we were on the phone will little much said. He kept asking me two questions: what do you think of me as a person and can you describe your personality.
I told him that he was nice but didn’t answer the second question because I didn’t know how to describe myself. I felt uncomfortable talking about myself. It made… it makes me feel vulnerable and that’s one of the last things I’d like to feel. Being vulnerable, shows weakness.  Specific weaknesses that people can use to take advantage of you. I try to stay neutral. Not overly protective of myself where people think I’m rude and not overly open so that people know every little thing that goes in my life. I just let people know what they want to know. 
What’s your favorite color? Green. What do you like to do? Run. Who’s your favorite football team? 49ers. To the point and occasionally very blunt. 
What was awkward for me was when I was falling asleep. He didn’t let me get off the phone. He just waited there. I fell asleep occasionally and woke up remembering that I was on the phone with him. I didn’t want to fall asleep when he was still on the line so I spent the last ten minutes trying to get off the phone with him. 
He eventually said, okay goodnight. Thanks for talking to me. And later that morning I received a text from him apologizing and asking if it was weird for me. 
It wasn’t weird at all. Just random.

Day 107/365: April 18, 2014

Unknown Caller: You receive a call from an unexpected person.Who is it, and what is the conversation about? Go!

This has actually happened to me recently. I received a call from a friend whom I haven’t seen or talked to in awhile. His name won’t be typed but I will talk about what happened. 

He called at around 10:00pm. He was drunk and was calling the people from his contact list and he told me he’d talk to the first person who would answer. I guess I was that person. We talked for about two hours.

What we talked about, I can’t remember. I’m still trying to comprehend how long we were on the phone will little much said. He kept asking me two questions: what do you think of me as a person and can you describe your personality.

I told him that he was nice but didn’t answer the second question because I didn’t know how to describe myself. I felt uncomfortable talking about myself. It made… it makes me feel vulnerable and that’s one of the last things I’d like to feel. Being vulnerable, shows weakness.  Specific weaknesses that people can use to take advantage of you. I try to stay neutral. Not overly protective of myself where people think I’m rude and not overly open so that people know every little thing that goes in my life. I just let people know what they want to know. 

What’s your favorite color? Green. What do you like to do? Run. Who’s your favorite football team? 49ers. To the point and occasionally very blunt. 

What was awkward for me was when I was falling asleep. He didn’t let me get off the phone. He just waited there. I fell asleep occasionally and woke up remembering that I was on the phone with him. I didn’t want to fall asleep when he was still on the line so I spent the last ten minutes trying to get off the phone with him. 

He eventually said, okay goodnight. Thanks for talking to me. And later that morning I received a text from him apologizing and asking if it was weird for me. 

It wasn’t weird at all. Just random.

1 day ago | 0 notes | reblog
Day 106/365: April 17, 2014
Million-Dollar Question: Why do you blog?
Why do I blog? There are many reasons. One of them is because I’ve gotten lazy to write out my thoughts on journals. By having this blog, it appears more organized. I can find a post with a click of a button or by typing in the specialized link. I think because of it being easily accessible I can come whenever I want and post whatever I want when I please. It’s the fact that I have this freedom to express myself to people whom I’ve never met. It’s not necessarily a safe place for me to speak my mind, but its something. It’s a place where I know I can write something angry or upset and either post it to the public or save it into my drafts to refer back to. 
The second reason to why I blog is because sometimes, I don’t feel comfortable, safe or I feel like the people I usually vent or rant to don’t understand how I’m actually feeling. I get tired of hearing the words “I know how you feel.” because they don’t. Everyone sees the world differently so how could you know exactly how I feel? I don’t come here for attention or to seek new followers. I come here to talk to anyone who’s interested in reading my thoughts. I highly doubt there are people out there interested in what I have to say, but it’s there for anyone to read. To either mock, criticize or relate to. 
Third would have to be the ability to post photos without going to the photo shop and spend money for a few printed photos. I love how we’re able to just upload our photos and post them wherever we’d like. I like being able to reblog other photos that catch my eye because in a sense my blog is a collection of things that I see. It’s my point of view. That’s how I want people to look at my blog and not one of those hipsters or whatever it is. 
So yeah, those are my three reasons to why I blog. 

Day 106/365: April 17, 2014

Million-Dollar Question: Why do you blog?

Why do I blog? There are many reasons. One of them is because I’ve gotten lazy to write out my thoughts on journals. By having this blog, it appears more organized. I can find a post with a click of a button or by typing in the specialized link. I think because of it being easily accessible I can come whenever I want and post whatever I want when I please. It’s the fact that I have this freedom to express myself to people whom I’ve never met. It’s not necessarily a safe place for me to speak my mind, but its something. It’s a place where I know I can write something angry or upset and either post it to the public or save it into my drafts to refer back to. 

The second reason to why I blog is because sometimes, I don’t feel comfortable, safe or I feel like the people I usually vent or rant to don’t understand how I’m actually feeling. I get tired of hearing the words “I know how you feel.” because they don’t. Everyone sees the world differently so how could you know exactly how I feel? I don’t come here for attention or to seek new followers. I come here to talk to anyone who’s interested in reading my thoughts. I highly doubt there are people out there interested in what I have to say, but it’s there for anyone to read. To either mock, criticize or relate to. 

Third would have to be the ability to post photos without going to the photo shop and spend money for a few printed photos. I love how we’re able to just upload our photos and post them wherever we’d like. I like being able to reblog other photos that catch my eye because in a sense my blog is a collection of things that I see. It’s my point of view. That’s how I want people to look at my blog and not one of those hipsters or whatever it is. 

So yeah, those are my three reasons to why I blog. 

1 day ago | 0 notes | reblog
 Day 105/365: April 16, 2014
Relationships: What is the most important thing in a relationship?
I don’t think I could name one thing that I find the most important. With relationships and love in general, its complicated. You kind of need a little bit of everything or the relationship could possibly fail.
You need: trust, loyalty, honesty, communication, faithfulness, commitment and a little risk. To me, that’s all important. That’s what every relationship needs. 
Trust, loyalty and honesty go hand in hand. If you can’t trust one another then there will always be tension. A sense of awkwardness and having the constant need to question each other’s every move. Loyalty is another important thing to have in a relationship, and I think that’s something we lack today. There don’t seem to be a lot of loyal people nowadays. Finally, honesty. Honesty is the best policy. I don’t know or understand how one could lie to their significant other. This person is someone that you’d hopefully want to spend the rest of your life with. 
Communication is key. I don’t think a relationship could survive without communication. It’s something that is required. Without it, then what would you have? Would you be able to label anything? Would you be able to sort out your problems and arguments? Communication would be at the top of the list. 
Faithful, another thing today’s world lacks in my personal opinion. Commitment would be the third thing that world today lacks. People are either afraid to commit or not ready to commit. 
Taking risks even though you’re unsure what the outcome ends up being would be the last thing I’d like to talk about. I haven’t really gone in depth with all the other stuff I’ve listed above but that’s all you’re going to get out of me for tonight. 
If you don’t take the risk, you’ll never know. And when you don’t know you’ll be left with what ifs and I wonders. It’s just up to you whether the risk is worth the pain. But keep this in mind, because it’s something I tell myself: if you really love that person, you wouldn’t be afraid to risk everything and fall head first into the unknown. If you’re willing to do that… that’s love. 

 Day 105/365: April 16, 2014

Relationships: What is the most important thing in a relationship?

I don’t think I could name one thing that I find the most important. With relationships and love in general, its complicated. You kind of need a little bit of everything or the relationship could possibly fail.

You need: trust, loyalty, honesty, communication, faithfulness, commitment and a little risk. To me, that’s all important. That’s what every relationship needs. 

Trust, loyalty and honesty go hand in hand. If you can’t trust one another then there will always be tension. A sense of awkwardness and having the constant need to question each other’s every move. Loyalty is another important thing to have in a relationship, and I think that’s something we lack today. There don’t seem to be a lot of loyal people nowadays. Finally, honesty. Honesty is the best policy. I don’t know or understand how one could lie to their significant other. This person is someone that you’d hopefully want to spend the rest of your life with. 

Communication is key. I don’t think a relationship could survive without communication. It’s something that is required. Without it, then what would you have? Would you be able to label anything? Would you be able to sort out your problems and arguments? Communication would be at the top of the list. 

Faithful, another thing today’s world lacks in my personal opinion. Commitment would be the third thing that world today lacks. People are either afraid to commit or not ready to commit. 

Taking risks even though you’re unsure what the outcome ends up being would be the last thing I’d like to talk about. I haven’t really gone in depth with all the other stuff I’ve listed above but that’s all you’re going to get out of me for tonight. 

If you don’t take the risk, you’ll never know. And when you don’t know you’ll be left with what ifs and I wonders. It’s just up to you whether the risk is worth the pain. But keep this in mind, because it’s something I tell myself: if you really love that person, you wouldn’t be afraid to risk everything and fall head first into the unknown. If you’re willing to do that… that’s love. 

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April 14, 2014: Break Up Season is a go.  
The Coastal Trail is not too far away from home, thank goodness. I’m excited on spending most of my days running the trail and sitting on one of numerous benches to sit and enjoy the view or to think about things.
All the snow, ice and puddles need to go because right now the trails don’t smell too great. 

April 14, 2014: Break Up Season is a go.  

The Coastal Trail is not too far away from home, thank goodness. I’m excited on spending most of my days running the trail and sitting on one of numerous benches to sit and enjoy the view or to think about things.

All the snow, ice and puddles need to go because right now the trails don’t smell too great. 

4 days ago | 0 notes | reblog